You’re not imagining it…
Living or working in a narcissist's orbit is exhausting in a way that's hard to explain to people who haven't been there. You might second-guess yourself. You’re likely walking on eggshells. You've probably googled "how to deal with a narcissist" at least once and not at a reasonable hour.
You’ve probably heard the standard advice: set limits, gray rock, or the more nuclear option: no contact. And sometimes that's exactly right.
But if you're not there yet, and if there's still something worth trying to salvage, here’s something else worth trying first.
Yep, they’re probably a narcissist. Now what?
WHAT THIS BOOK IS
A different way to help a narcissist change…
Most books about narcissism are written for you, the person trying to coexist with a narcissist. They’re full of strategies for coping, managing, or exiting.
This book is written for them.
Me? A Narcissist's Guide to Not Dying Alone makes the case (directly, and with some humor) that the way they're behaving is costing them things they actually want. It doesn't appeal to their better nature. It speaks to their self-interest. Which, if you know a narcissist, you already know is a more reliable entry point.
The side effect is that the people around them start to notice things changing for the better. Including you.
A NOTE FROM THE AUTHOR
Hear me out.
Hello, you.
If a narcissist has been wreaking havoc on your inner peace, I'm guessing you're exhausted. Frustrated. Maybe desperate.
I've been in your shoes. I grew up with a narcissist for a dad, then worked for one for too many years. And what sucks isn't just navigating the impact of their nonsense on my own feelings, but also the particular frustration of feeling like there was nothing I could do about it. Nothing I could say that would make a dent. Like they were coated in teflon, covered in kevlar.
Because confronting a narcissist about their behavior tends to trigger them. Most narcissists are actually quite fragile. Something happened to them when they were young that created an overblown response to any perceived threat to their self-image. They’re just wounded creatures lashing out. For the most part, they don’t want to hurt you. It’s just what happens.
That's where this book comes in. It's a way of sending a message, anonymously if you like. A way of saying "hey, you're being an dickhead and it's going to cost you" without them even knowing it was you. And it provides them with an opportunity to explore all of this in a private way, where no one is judging them. And that helps open the door to change.
Is this realistic?
Honestly, the research on narcissistic change isn't wildly optimistic, because most people with narcissistic traits don't think they need to change.
But it does happen, particularly for people who genuinely want to change (and they do exist!). It’s less likely if the person is acting like they want to because someone gave them an ultimatum. This book is designed to nudge someone in that direction, though. It won't work on everyone. But if there's a flicker of curiosity in there, it's worth a try.
HOW TO USE THIS BOOK
Think of it as a gift.
Buy it for them. Leave it somewhere visible—a desk, a porch, a mailbox. Send it with a note that says "this made me think of you" or skip the note entirely. If you order it online, check to see what the shipper’s policy is about including the buyer’s info. Amazon tends to keep that info hard to find, if not completely absent.
But it works best when they start reading because something in them is feeling the tiniest bit introspective (not because they feel accused). That introspection might get kickstarted by the subtitle alone. You never know.
Most books about narcissism are written for the people who have to deal with one. This one is written for the narcissist.
It's for people who are a little bit the problem… more often than they'd like to admit, in ways they don't always see clearly. It's warm-but-direct, research-backed, and, for what it's worth, kind of funny.
What you'll get: a clear-eyed look at how narcissistic behavior costs you the things you actually want:
your relationships
your career
your health
And it shares a simple tool to start changing that. No personality transplant required.
The ebook is provided as an “EPUB” file. This file type can be opened by ebook readers, including Books (Apple), Kobo, Google Play, Nook, Calibre, Sumatra, Adobe Digital Editions, etc.
Most books about narcissism are written for the people who have to deal with one. This one is written for the narcissist.
It's for people who are a little bit the problem… more often than they'd like to admit, in ways they don't always see clearly. It's warm-but-direct, research-backed, and, for what it's worth, kind of funny.
What you'll get: a clear-eyed look at how narcissistic behavior costs you the things you actually want:
your relationships
your career
your health
And it shares a simple tool to start changing that. No personality transplant required.
The ebook is provided as an “EPUB” file. This file type can be opened by ebook readers, including Books (Apple), Kobo, Google Play, Nook, Calibre, Sumatra, Adobe Digital Editions, etc.